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Searching for Your Soul Mate But Unsuccessful

There are some single people who are constantly out looking for a mate, and they are miserable because God has not sent them one yet. They have prayed and prayed, yet they still have no mate. Some settle for Satan’s provision instead of asking God for the patience to wait for the one whom He would send. If they would look to Jesus and seek to please Him, rather than being concerned about a mate, soon they would find the right one crossing their path.

Looking for a man or woman to just keep them from being lonely or just to fill their needs or to be a father or mother to their children should not be the only reasons for desiring a mate. They also need to be concerned about what kind of husband or wife they would be for a mate. These single people are still much in the flesh if they just want their own needs met. They should ask the Lord to fill them with His love and peace.

Being single is an important time to prepare us for marriage. It can also be a time to experience a closer communion with God. As we seek God to cleanse us of the world and help us become the kind of wife or husband that would bless someone, we will soon find that we are not lonely. First, the Lord would begin using us to bless others; then we will find we are content in Him. Eventually, in God’s plan and timing, He will bless us with a wonderful mate so that both lives can be a witness for Him. We believe if a marriage cannot glorify the Lord, then it would be better to remain alone. There are worse things than being alone. One of these is to be out of God’s will by compromising and marrying someone who does not feel the same way we do about the Lord.

Marriage is the second major choice we make in our lives, and we should never enter into it without much prayer. To rush into a marriage can be disastrous. The most important decision of our lives, of course, is our decision to follow the Lord. This decision is not a one-time declaration, but a daily determination to follow Jesus above all. If we allow the emotional or soulish realm to dominate our lives we become more susceptible to the enemy leading us astray through someone. This area of the flesh should be brought under the Lord’s subjection so that Satan does not get the advantage and consequently destroy our lives and ministries. So many have failed the Lord because they chose a man or woman over the Lord.

Our emotions need to be cleansed. If God is not in a relationship it is not true love. What this world calls love is really lust since it is built on what the other person does for me, not what I can do for him or her. If the other person fails to keep up his end of the bargain, a divorce occurs because the offended mate is no longer pleased. This is the attitude of the world’s so-called “love.” God’s love loves without receiving back; God’s love is forgiving and patient. God’s love is gentle and kind. God’s love waits. God’s love sacrifices. Read1 Corinthians 13

Man’s emotions are not a reliable gauge upon which to establish a marriage relationship. We must know in the Spirit that it is God’s will. It is much better to marry for character than for emotion. Emotions fluctuate; character doesn’t. Emotions are in the soulish realm, and unless the carnal mind has been renewed, Satan can give us emotions or feelings of love for someone of his choosing. (If he did not have this in his power, he could not split up marriages.) One of his favorite techniques is to suddenly take away the feelings one once had for his mate and give feelings for someone else. When he has successfully convinced a person that he no longer loves his or her mate, then he leads them to divorce, whispering, “You are living a lie.” After he has destroyed that marriage, he then leads one to marry again by stirring their emotions for another. Often after their next marriage something happens that they do not expect. Before too long, friction begins to develop with the new mate, then arguing. Finally, they find the same thing has happened again; they feel no emotion for their new mate and the next divorce is in the making. “Falling” in love is Satan’s way. The very expression of these words should tell us something. A Christian should not blindly “fall” into any trap. Love is bigger than simply falling for someone. Certainly, the Lord gives us a wonderful emotional feeling for the one we are to marry. However, this “feeling” without God’s direction can be disastrous as Satan can tamper with our emotions and feelings too.

Marriage, in a Christian’s life, should be based on a decision directed by the Holy Spirit. A Christian’s love for another is a commitment. Of course, the Lord will supply the emotions for the mate He sends, but that should not be the criterion for making the decision to marry. The Lord should be sought, and whatever He speaks to us we should do. He knows the future and what is best for us. If we trust Him He will not fail us in this or any other important area. Women or men who allow emotions to rule them will never be victorious Christians. Emotions should always follow, never lead.

During Old and New Testament times, fathers and mothers chose the mates for their children. God’s people were very careful to choose those who were “believers.” We find this practice still prevalent in India and other Eastern cultures. The parents, being older and more prudent, made wiser decisions than the children in this area. The divorce rate in India is only about 7%, whereas in the USA, at the present, it is nearing 50%. Marriages that are loveless can be saved and restored simply by asking God to restore the love that was once there. Sexual relationships can also be healed by praying for a desire for one’s mate. Prayer is a mighty weapon. God’s love can mend and heal, providing people are willing to lay down their lives for their mates. His love will not fade, as does the love of the world.

Those who are single and have never been married are cautioned in God’s Word to seek a mate who is a like believer. “Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? (2 Corinthians 6:14).” Many precious people suffer because they are living with unsaved mates. Some did not have Christ when they made their marriage decision, but they have since found the Lord. Those will have God’s grace and love to win their mates for Jesus. The Lord always strives to bring the lost mate to Himself through the partner who knows Him. Mighty miracles of deliverance and salvation have occurred when people have endured suffering in order to bring their mates to the Lord. Those people who have the light, but choose to marry into darkness by yoking themselves to unsaved mates find that their flesh has led them away from God.

The Lord wants to bless marriage unions and see His plans fulfilled in both mates’ lives. What a glorious plan He had from the beginning for both male and female. We can trust Him in this important decision. If we will totally commit to do His will we will never be disappointed in the one He sends into our lives.

Betty Miller

 


Stop The Chase & Ask God To Show Your Mate ❃John Hagee❃

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9 Responses to “Searching for Your Soul Mate But Unsuccessful”

  1. This is A Great article!

  2. Marriage, in a Christian’s life, should be based on a decision directed by the Holy Spirit. A Christian’s love for another is a commitment. Of course, the Lord will supply the emotions for the mate He sends, but that should not be the criterion for making the decision to marry. The Lord should be sought, and whatever He speaks to us we should do. He knows the future and what is best for us. If we trust Him He will not fail us in this or any other important area. Women or men who allow emotions to rule them will never be victorious Christians. Emotions should always follow, never lead. …..

  3. Where do you get the scripture for this? I mean really?

  4. The above post is not from my words…. they are part of the articlle.

  5. Some things my dear brother come from revelation and wisdom which God does show us…Not every one of your decisions in life will have a scripture to back it up but wisdom in making those decisions must be applied so that we are able to choose Gods will and way. And we need the fruit of self control that through obedience is produced within us. A person who yeilds to the Holy Spirit and is full of His Spirit knows what Gods perfect will for their lives is…Good counsel and decision making can always come from the Lord….But we must be still and KNOW that He is God and able to help us choose correctly. We do not want to live in fear because fear is false evidence appearing real. We want to be full of His power and love… Many are enslaved in fear and that is sad. But fear is what is behind those that have problems thinking they may make the wrong decision. They need deliverance and filling. We need to trust God to help us make those decisions and trust in HIS confidence that is within us. Many of us have weak faith and those who are strong need to be tenderhearted with those who are weak…..

  6. Here is the confusion I get so overwhelmed with in this kind of thinking… It says they are looking for a mate (implies they make a choice) and then it say God has not SENT one. Then it talks about why God may have not sent on (divine providence) then it says it is the second biggest CHOICE you will make. If God sends something, you better take it, like it or not. If it is a dedicsion, make a Godly decision. I am doing a private study right now of married and divorced Christians, they have no idea the premise or the person asking the question, they just have the question: Did you pray about your mate before you married them or did you just love them and committed to them without prayer. Overwhelmingly, so far, the ones who just decided to love someone they could live with, are the ones whose marriage lasted. CHOICE, not divine provision. I am not saying God does not give instruction, but what does this say of this message?

  7. If I may just add, I never prayed for a mate, before we met DC..I was praying only to be a servant to the Lord, to be his vessel in anyway possible. To grow and learn and become a daughter, He would be well pleased with. But I do feel the Lord rewards humbleness, good deeds and obedience. I still think you are a gift to me…I just cannot help it. Now I find myself praying everyday for us. Praying that this is indeed His holy will for both of us. And most of all, I pray that we never forget who we are in Him, that He is our Creator, and Heavenly Father…that we are His willing and obedient children, ready to sacrifice anything for His name’s sake. Now, everyday I feel there is confirmation, the fruit we bear together, we are made better servants together, than alone…this feeling of joy and freedom, are all things I was looking for, as our journey together started. I trust in the Lord with our lives, and with our love and future.

  8. NOT OUT LOOKING!! WAITING ON THE LORD! BUT WE [I] MUST DO SOMETHING AMEN!! GOD WILL SHOW ME WHO? I KNOW DEEP IN MY HEART OF HEARTS HE IS GOING TO!

  9. Of course, what a magnificent website and illuminating posts, I definitely will bookmark your blog.Have an awsome day!…


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