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Top 10 In-Laws Coping Tips

In-laws can be a tremendous source of support and closeness. They can also be a major problem in your marital relationship. Here are some tips to help you cope with your in-laws.

1. RESPECT
Even if you don’t think your in-laws deserve it, show respect for them anyway.

2. LOYALTY
It is natural that your spouse may feel some loyalty for his/her family. It’s OK as long as you don’t come in second.

3. CRITICISM
Even if you have the in-laws from hell, don’t criticize them. If you spouse criticizes them, just listen. Making comments other than asking clarifying questions can create problems.

4. ROOTS
Take time to discover both your genetic and cultural roots and share them with your spouse.

5. FEELINGS
Identify and share your feelings about your family of origin with your partner.

6. HEALING
If you are having difficulties with your own family issues, it is important that you be open to healing any past injuries so you can move forward in your life with your spouse.

7. BOUNDARIES
Define and set boundaries with your in-laws concerning your feelings, thoughts and expectations about holidays, vacations, visits, time with grandchildren, financial issues, and privacy.

8. SAYING NO
Know when you have had enough. Have a password if necessary so that your spouse understands when it is time to end the visit with your in-laws.

9. CARE GIVING
As your in-laws and parents age, it is important that you discuss practical concerns with them such as their health and financial issues. Find out their expectations about their care in case they cannot provide for themselves in their later years.

10. PRIORITY
Remember to put your marriage first.

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